Schitzo

I feel like I'm in my own version of some weird split personality disorder. Being a divorced mom, I have the life of a doting mom who is there for her kids.....AND that of a 20+ year old who likes to go out and do adventurous things.

Can I sustain this life for long? Do I want to? Sure. There are parts of it that are so much fun, I hope that I am teaching my kids that age had no bearing on what a person can do or what someone thinks is fun. I know too many people that think they can no longer go out to clubs, events or even simply to learn how to do something new when they have kids. I do not want to be that kind of parent. I want to teach my kids that learning is not done the minute you get out of school. It is a continual process.

One weekend I am writing about the wonderful things my kids did and about the minutes that I get to spend with them creating a dinner or doing a fun event. I think of adventures that I can do with them and things they will enjoy. I think of things that are family friendly - from going to the zoo, museum or even a movie.

But then the next weekend, I will do something like going out to see my friend's band perform, or a long hike, or shopping until the mall closes, or perfecting my snowboarding skills (so my kids believe that I have just learned only when they are with me - sneaky huh?) I fill my time with things I enjoy but can not do with the kids in tow - especially at the ages that they are now. My kids at age 10 and 11 are typically bored when I drag them to something that is too "family friendly" because they are too "old" for the event. Or they are bored because it is all a bunch of adults or certainly not their speed. They do not like to go on my long hikes. They can't go to a casino for the evening. They would not be welcomed at the bar (nor would I take them there).